


What Are Friends For?

by mischiefmanager



Series: Living the Dream [1]
Category: Eyewitness (US TV)
Genre: Crying, Getting Back Together, Long-Distance Relationship, Lukas Goes Pro, M/M, Philip Is In College, Phone Sex, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-08
Updated: 2017-01-08
Packaged: 2018-09-15 15:15:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9241160
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mischiefmanager/pseuds/mischiefmanager
Summary: They're friends now--it's easier that way because long distance sucks. So it's cool that Philip could maybe be possibly hooking up with other guys, right? Lukas doesn't have a problem with that. Why would he? They're friends.Lukas calls Philip the night before a race to check in.





	

_Friends_. The word has bounced off the walls of Lukas’s mind continually over the past few weeks. He and Philip are friends. Best friends, even. Like sure, they were boyfriends for two years—but relationships are really fucking hard to maintain when one person is traveling the motocross circuit and the other is planted firmly in college for the foreseeable future. 

And it’s not like Lukas doesn’t want Philip to make friends—he knows it’s not easy to meet people when you’re constantly beholden to a boyfriend whom you Skype with every night and Snapchat with from the moment you wake up until you fall asleep. So, Lukas had suggested...friends. And Philip had been quiet for a second, but then he’d said “If you think that’s best” in really a very normal voice, and so that’s how they became _friends_.

Not that much has changed, actually. They still Snapchat, they still text, they’ve even Skyped twice a week...not that Lukas is keeping track, because that would be kind of stupid—to count exactly how often you were Skyping your friend.

Lukas grimaces at the clock—he’s been out practicing way too late and he has a race tomorrow morning. He pulls his motocross gear off and hangs it up in the hotel closet so it won’t get too wrinkled, grabs the bag of chips he bought from a vending machine (that’s dinner—oops, his dad wouldn’t like that), and settles in on the bed to eat alone in his pajamas. 

It’s a Friday night. Philip’s art college has got to have a bitchin’ party scene—Philip has said he wouldn’t know because he doesn’t really go to parties, but he has no reason not to go now. In fact, Philip’s probably at a party right now. He’s made a few friends at school in the photography department, Lukas knows about them, and he has a roommate with a girlfriend who is nice and not there very often.

The chips are gone in a few bites and Lukas spares a thought for how he should’ve done a better job planning his meals, but his mind quickly yanks him back to the subject of what Philip might be doing right now. Lukas bets he’s at a party. Good for him.

Lukas brushes his teeth and settles into bed because it’s 11:30 and he’s got to be up at 6:00 tomorrow morning for a race. The bed is fine but unfamiliar, the sheets smooth but too cold. Lukas turns out the light and rolls onto his side to go to sleep.

Philip is definitely at a party—maybe even a party with a bunch of other gay guys. Man, that would be good, right? They were the only gay couple in Tivoli, so it would be really...something...for Philip to be able to hang out with a bunch of other dudes who know how it is. Lukas bets Philip would really like that.

And those guys probably really like having Philip around. Philip is an incredibly talented photographer so he’s sure their parties will be well-documented. And he’s pretty funny and really cool and just a great friend. Lukas can imagine Philip being like an awesome first friend for someone who is new to the gay scene.

Also, Philip is really fucking hot—Lukas is positive he’s not the only one who has noticed. He wonders what Philip is wearing to these parties. He looks good in green, and Lukas has told him that, so maybe he’s wearing a green shirt. Probably jeans and a hoodie—Philip really never dresses up, but he looks so good in casual clothes that it hardly matters. Lukas rolls over to his other side and he can imagine Philip walking through the door, smirking, pulling back the covers...getting into bed with him... 

 _Friends,_ Lukas reminds himself—and his dick. We’re _friends._

He bets the other guys are all over Philip. He wonders if Philip has told them he’s single now—probably, why keep it a secret? Oh man, those guys must have been so excited to hear that Philip’s available. They probably are fighting over asking him out—he’s sure Philip is surrounded by a whole crowd of dudes vying for his attention.

Something is squeezing his chest. He feels like he’s going to hurl and cry all at once. Philip is...Philip is probably out getting hit on _right now_ , and he has no reason on earth not to go home with one of those guys. Someone else is getting to experience Philip’s hot, desperate kisses and gentle touches and Philip’s beautiful body... 

Before he can even think about it, his shaking fingers are scrambling for his phone on the nightstand and speed dialing Philip.

Ring....ring.... ring.... r

“Hey, what’s up?”

Philip’s soft voice floods his ears and he lets out a shaky breath. 

“Hi,” Lukas whispers back. There’s no noise in the background. If Philip is at a party, it’s a really freaking quiet one. If he was in the middle of hooking up with some guy, he wouldn’t have answered his phone. 

“Is everything okay?” Philip asks.

“Uh, yeah,” says Lukas. He feels really stupid right now. Why did he call Philip? What is he even going to say to him?

“What are you doing right now?” he blurts out, and he wants to slap himself. It’s none of Lukas’s business anymore what Philip is doing. They’re friends.

“Nothing much,” says Philip, sounding a little confused, “I was just editing some pictures for class. My roommate’s out with his girlfriend again tonight.” 

“Oh,” Lukas replies dumbly, “That’s...cool. What...um...What kind of pictures?”

He winces—it’s such a lame question, but he can’t bear the thought of hanging up because he feels like Philip’s voice is suddenly the only thing keeping him from falling apart.

“Of you, actually,” Philip admits with a little laugh, “They’re some of your motocross promo ones that we took back in Tivoli, remember?” 

Lukas remembers. Those were great pictures, but to be honest, Lukas can’t tell the difference between the ones Philip says are good and the ones he hates. Everything Philip does is amazing.

“You looked...really good that day,” says Philip, and his voice is kind of low and throaty. And just like that, a switch flips inside Lukas and he smiles to himself.

“Yeah?” he replies, “How so?”

“Well,” says Philip, and Lukas can hear him smirking, “You were wearing that blue shirt I like under your gear. And then after we took the pictures we went back to the barn...” 

It’s like Philip’s voice is hotwired into Lukas’s dick. At his mention of the barn, a flood of memories come bursting to the forefront of Lukas’s mind—memories of Philip on his knees, Lukas’s hands gripping the bike behind him for support while Philip sucked and licked until his legs were shaking, and then laying Philip down in the hay and doing it back to him, feeling Philip’s hands in his hair...

“Tell me about the barn again,” says Lukas. What the fuck? Where did that come from? Lukas had no idea that he had the balls to suggest something like that, and he half expects Philip to hang up on him because Philip is under no obligation to indulge this shit—they’re not boyfriends, they never even did this when they _were_ boyfriends. 

There’s a pause. Then— “Hold on.”

Lukas hears everything in perfect clarity—the click of the lock on Philip’s door, the rustle of sheets as he gets into bed, even the sound of Philip pulling down the zipper on his jeans. He’s not even sure it’s possible for him to have heard these things, but his mind supplies the images to go along with the sounds nonetheless. Before he can second guess himself further, he shoves his hand into his underwear. 

“I knew I wanted to blow you when we were riding back,” Philip admits, “It’s a bitch being on that thing when you’re hard, isn’t it?”

“Yeah,” Lukas agrees, “and it used to happen all the goddamn time when you were riding behind me.”

“Oh yeah? Not now?”

“Never now,” Lukas tells him, stroking himself slowly, “I actually ride better when I’m not thinking about fucking the person on the back of the bike, believe it or not.”

Philip laughs and the sound is beautiful—if he could bottle the way Philip’s laugh makes him feel and sell it, he could retire and they could buy a penthouse in the city together. Wait—what? 

“I wanted to blow you on the bike but I thought you probably didn’t want to mess it up, so I just waited until you got off and took off your helmet— “

“Then you kind of just yanked down my pants and started going for it,” Lukas finished for him.

“Yeah, sorry about that,” says Philip, “I should’ve asked, I just— “

“Don’t be sorry dude,” Lukas chuckles, “It was hot as hell. I’ve never gotten so hard so fast in my life.”

“I’m getting there,” Philip tells him, and it takes Lukas a second to process what he means, but when he does, he squeezes the base of his dick and inhales sharply.

“Is this okay?” says Philip.

“Yeah,” Lukas breathes, “Keep talking.”

“You know what part I really loved?” Philip asks him. 

“What?”

“When I was down there and I like...just started rubbing my lips on you...the sounds you made when I did that...Do you remember?”

“Oh God,” Lukas whispers. He remembers so well it’s like it’s happening again _right now_. Philip’s lips grazing the tip of his dick, nuzzling down the underside, wet and warm and soft—teasing and licking for what felt like hours. Philip was _so_ good at that.

“And then when I thought you were ready— “

“—I was fucking ready, dude, I was like about to come already— “

“Yeah, well, then I put my mouth all the way around and sucked on you...” Philip’s voice is breathy in that way Lukas knows means he’s getting close. Lukas licks his hand and wraps his fingers around the head, trying to imagine it’s Philip’s mouth. It’s nowhere near as good, but the sound of Philip’s breathing is almost enough by itself.

“And then I put my hands on your thighs and you grabbed my hair, and sometimes I’d even like, try to grind up against your leg while I was doing it because you sounded so good I couldn’t even wait— “

Philip cuts off with a familiar gasp and a choked-off groan that Lukas knows the meaning of—he can imagine Philip’s hand wrapped around himself and stroking as he comes, in exactly the same motion he used to use on Lukas. 

And that’s when Lukas feels the thrum of his orgasm coil up and release so fast he doesn’t even have time to try and slow it down—he comes to the memory of Philip rocking himself against Lukas’s leg while he’s sucking on him, and then Lukas coming in his mouth and Philip just licking and sucking until Lukas gasps that he can stop—and Philip swallowing, licking his lips, and then lying down together in the hay, Philip curling up next to Lukas... 

“Whew,” breathes Philip. 

“Yeah, thanks,” Lukas tells him, and he suddenly remembers that he’s here in a hotel room on too-cold sheets that aren’t his, and Philip is hundreds of miles away and they’re _friends_ now, friends who apparently have phone sex just for fun. His throat feels tight again and he blinks rapidly against the stupid tears threatening to form at the corners of his eyes. 

“Sure,” says Philip softly, “What’s that lame saying? What are friends for?” 

And then, horrifyingly, Lukas bursts into tears. He knows Philip can hear them—a shaky sob erupts from his mouth and he’s crying harder than he’s cried in years, not even bothering to wipe his eyes as his nose immediately clogs and his vision blurs.

“Whoa—Hey Lukas, Lukas?” says Philip, and there’s rustling like he’s sitting up in bed, “What’s wrong?”

Lukas can barely even speak through his tears—it’s the kind of ugly, snotty crying that forces him to take gasping breaths and makes it difficult for anybody to understand him.

“I—I don’t w-want to be f-f-friends,” he sobs.

“Okay,” says Philip gently, “You don’t want to be friends? What— “

“I m-miss you,” he says, and the dam bursts even further—all his insecurities about Philip finding someone else, and them being apart and everything else fill him up until he feels like he’s going to drown in his misery.

“I miss you too,” Philip says quietly, and Lukas can swear he hears his voice quavering.

“I love you,” Lukas whispers shakily into the phone, “You don’t have...like...a n-new boyf-f-friend, do you?”

“No,” says Philip quickly, “No, no, no—It’s only you, I don’t have...no. Don’t you think I’d have told you if I met someone?”

Lukas ignores the question. “Can we g-get back together? Please? Ph-Philip I— “

“Yes,” Philip tells him immediately, “Yes, we can do the long-distance thing again. We’ll make it work.”

The knot in his chest releases. He’s still crying, but now it’s just because Philip’s not here—he just wants to see his boyfriend again. Boyfriend. Deep breath. 

“S-sorry,” he gasps, grasping for tissues on the bedside table, “I just— “

“Don’t be sorry,” Philip reassures him, “I’m...I’m crying too, you just can’t really hear it that well, I guess.”

Now that Philip mentions it, Lukas thinks his voice does sound kind of stuffy.

“When will you be in New York again?” Philip asks, punctuating it with a loud sniff. 

“I d-don’t have any real time off for like th-three more w-weeks,” Lukas tells him, wiping his nose, ignoring the fresh wave of tears that accompanies this admission, and then he decides something reckless, “But I’m fucking flying out there tomorrow after my race—I’ll only be able to be with you for like a day but I _have_ to see you—I— “ 

“Okay,” says Philip, “Tell me what time your flight gets in and I’ll meet you at the airport.”

“Okay,” Lukas agrees, and he blows his nose wetly with a sound like a foghorn. Ugh. The clock glares at him as if to remind him he’s got a race in six fucking hours. 

“You have to get some sleep, right?” Philip says, like he can read Lukas’s mind. 

“Yeah,” says Lukas. He _really_ doesn’t want to get off the phone, and he’s _just_ stopped crying—he’s worried if they say goodbye he’ll start again. “Can you...I know this is stupid, but can you like...talk to me? Until I fall asleep?”

“Of course,” Philip whispers back, always obliging, always helpful and patient and accommodating, “What do you want me to talk about?”

“Your project,” says Lukas, yawning and curling up in the bed, closing his swollen eyes, “You. Anything you want. I love you.” 

“I love you too,” says Philip, “Um, so...the lighting was really good that day, but for some of them my shutter speed was off. I think I found one where it all came together though...”

Lukas falls asleep to the sound of Philip’s voice, imagining tomorrow afternoon when he’ll fall asleep again with Philip tucked under his arm, where he belongs.

**Author's Note:**

> A million thank yous to Jillian_Bowes and Dawn_Seeker for beta reading this for me.
> 
> Please let me know if you liked it, and feel free to contact me on Tumblr (mischiefxmanager) if you want to talk about Philkas!


End file.
